Author: Emilie E. Palmer

Date: 5 July 1861

Location: Emilie E. Palmer 1859 Diary, Record Group 19/2, Oberlin College Archives

Document Type: Autograph Document

Introduction:  

Palmer describes the Independence Day celebration she anticipated in her previous 3 July 1861 entry. She also mentions a lecture by James Fairchild, a significant figure in the history of Oberlin College. Her appreciation for his words provides an example of the way in which Palmer often sought solace in religion. These particular musings suggest that Palmer struggled with finding her religious identity, and engaged with her own concept of “worthiness” under God. This thinking reflects the religious nature of Oberlin College during this time, and the ways in which the Civil War led many to look to God as a form of reckoning with the violence occurring around them.

Document Text:

Heartache65th

Yesterday I went to Lagrange [sic] with Augustine. I was disappointed—didn’t see any thing but dancing and what I saw and heard sickened me. I am so thankful that I was not brought up to do such things.1

I attended the [illegible] lecture this afternoon. Mr. Fairchild2 spoke from the words “Give none occasion to the adversary, to speak reproachfully.”3 It was what I needed. God grant that it be profitable to me. I know that the only way to be a true Christian is to live in constant communion with the Savior. Thus we shall be prepared to work for God and to see the way when he points it out. I feel not in any way worthy to go to the table of the Lord. My heart must be made right.

Transcribed by Frances Casey

1Palmer was in LaGrange, Ohio for the July 4 celebration because all the military companies were there. It is likely that she was scandalized by the dancing she saw. This is not surprising given that the town of Oberlin and Oberlin College were founded simultaneously to “renounce bad habits” and exclude “worldly influences.” (James Fairchild, Oberlin: The Colony and The College, 1833-1883 (Oberlin: E. J. Goodrich, 1883), pp. 26 and 16.)

2In 1861, James Harris Fairchild (1817-1902) was the chair of Systematic Theology and Moral Philosophy at Oberlin College. Fairchild was also instrumental in the Oberlin-Wellington Rescue, as he housed John Price in September 1858. He would later serve as the Oberlin College’s third President from 1866-1889. (“James Harris Fairchild (1817-1902)” Oberlin College Archives, Web address, accessed 11 March 2015.).

3This is an excerpt from 1 Timothy 5:14, which in its entirety states: “I will therefore that the younger women marry, bear children, guide the house, give none occasion to the adversary to speak reproachfully.” Timothy, Chapter 5, discusses conduct for widows.